The Passion of What We Believe and the Passion of Being Right

When I was a child I often heard people give the advice that one should never talk about politics or religion. This advice was given long before anyone heard the term “political correctness”. The basis for this advice was to help you to avoid conflict in a social situation. Many people are very passionate about what they believe in regards to politics and religion and when two or more people speak of such things you could almost guarantee that their will be some difference of opinion which could flare into a major emotional disagreement.

Interestingly enough many people are not that passionate in their day to day beliefs, however if challenged, these same people often turn into a passionate evangelist of sorts. We may be luke-warm in our practice of what we proclaim to believe however challenge our belief and watch out, the doors are open and the gloves are off.

I believe that many become so passionate in defense of what they believe not because they believe so strongly, rather because they are passionate about being right. It is the basic tenant of most political parties and organized religions that they hold the truth, the one and only way and to deviate from that which they believe is heresy and to commit heresy is to open one self to bad fortune in politics and eternal damnation in many religions.

In both politics and religion we are often told that it is good to be curious and to ask questions to gain a better understanding of our beliefs. Allowing one to question their beliefs is a good thing and seems very progressive, however what they fail to tell you is the rest of the rule which is “We encourage you to explore your curiosity and ask questions to better understand that which you prescribe to believe … as long as in the end you are willing to accept our answers”.

“It is unwise to be too sure of one’s own wisdom. It is healthy to be reminded that the strongest might weaken and the wisest might err” – Mohandas Gandhi

We must be aware and careful of those who proclaim to have absolute answers. When we accept something, anything as an absolute truth we have sealed the door to growth. We all have our beliefs, our knowings and this is good, however we must always leave room for the possibility that what we know today is not absolute and that tomorrow, next year or sometime down the road we may discover that which we thought with much passion to be true is not true with what we know today.

We must be aware of our self and ask “Am I passionate about what I believe or am I passionate about being right?” Weather it be politics, religion, our relationships or anything else, the cost of “being right” can be very high indeed. We learn and grow by allowing the thoughts of others to permeate our being. It is often these very thoughts which may conflict with our current beliefs which help to unlock the truth which resides within us.

Drop your guard and allow yourself to listen rather than defend and allow yourself to change your beliefs as you grow. Just because you believe differently today than you did yesterday does not mean you were once wrong, it simply means that you have allowed yourself to learn and to grow.

Learning the Lessons of Ebenezer Scrooge

Tis the season to watch holiday movies. Holiday movies almost always offer a lesson or two and most of the lessons are right in your face. We can see the obvious lesson given to us in a “Charlie Brown Christmas” or “It’s a Wonderful Life”. I sat down one evening this weekend to watch the big screen adaptation of “A Christmas Carol”, another holiday movie with an “in your face” lesson about life. In this case I watched the version where George C. Scott played the cantankerous, miser Ebenezer Scrooge. “Scrooge” has become what we call a person who is not in the holiday spirit or who is a miser, whose god is money and lacks compassion for their fellow man.

I have seen this version of “A Christmas Carol” numerous times over the years, however this time I picked up something that Scrooge says towards the end of the story when he is begging the spirit of Christmas Future to allow him another chance, a chance to redeem himself and to apply the lessons which the spirits of Christmas have imparted upon him.

On his knees, Ebenezer beseeches the spirits of Christmas and exclaims “I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year. I will live in the Past, the Present, and the Future. The Spirits of all Three shall strive within me. I will not shut out the lessons that they teach.”

Mr. Charles Dickens had inserted a wonderful wisdom into this story, one which I had missed acknowledging all of the times before; which is to live in the now. Mr. Dickens had stated a universal truth in this lesson and that was, the only time is now and that it is in the “now” that we find the past, present and future. He goes on to say that the spirits of the past, present and future shall live within me.

What many consider “new age” thinking as you can see is not new at all. Many of the great lessons are to found in song lyrics, stories and writings that stretch over the centuries. I am continually amazed by the lessons which I have missed that are found in loved and well known songs, stories and writings.

It is as if the lessons were hidden from view, expressed in some sort of code which blinded me to their existence and only revealed to me as I broke the code. In a way this is what happens, truths and lessons are revealed to me as I am ready to receive them.

It is for this reason that it is wise to revisit stories, songs and writings, for we may be ready to receive lessons that we were once not ready for.

Dust off an old book today and re-visit it like an old friend and read it once again with today’s eyes and you may be surprised by what you find.

There is much wisdom available to the soul which is awake.

Note: It is interesting that we choose to remember the character of Scrooge for his bad qualities and not for the lesson he learns and the person he becomes.

Removing Rules, Competitivness and Keeping Score From Your Relationships

When we participate in a game we normally recognize and accept that there are rules, competitiveness and keeping score. These three things are the basic framework of any game and they work well for a game structure.

Many people approach relationships with the same type of structure. Many people build their relationships with the structure of a game with rules, competitiveness and keeping score. Works great for games, not so well for building successful long term relationships.

If competitiveness was for things like who did the dishes first or who took the garbage out to the curb first it would probably help a relationship, however competitiveness in a relationship is usually about who has more power in the relationship, who’s on top, who has control. When we become concerned with who has the power we are navigating our relationship with our ego at the helm. Our ego loves to be in charge and to win or be on top at any cost. Our ego does not care so much about the other person’s needs or feelings; rather our ego is all about itself. When we compete for power in a relationship brick by brick we build walls which become limitations for the growth of our relationship.

Rules, rules, rules! Most relationships have spoken and unspoken rules. Some may say there must be rules to maintain a healthy structure of a relationship, however when we are doing or not doing things within a relationship because of rules, we are not operating from our heart, we are not being true to our self or our relationship. An example would be, in most long term relationships there is a spoken or unspoken rule that no major purchases will be made without consulting with the other person. The person who usually breaks this rule is the person who feels obligated by this rule. A person in this situation tends to rebel and break the rule. In a loving, spiritual relationship the rule is not necessary because we are living from our heart and we are living our relationship from our spirit and it is natural for us to want to discuss this type of decision and make the decision based on what is best for the whole. We do this because we are not separate from our relationship; there is no separation and therefore no need for rigid rules.

When we are the relationship and not separate from it there is no desire to keep score. Keeping score is a product of the ego driven mind. The ego loves to keep score and use the scoreboard as a weapon to manipulate the other person or to justify our behavior. When we keep score we are saying look how many times I have done this or how many times you have done that. Keeping score is for games. In relationships we should do what we do because we desire to do so not because we are trying to one up the other person or not do something because it is not our turn. Keeping score creates a mentality of us against them and in the end builds distance between people rather than bringing people together.

When we understand that our relationships are not to be played like a game we begin to accept and to allow each other to be and we allow an “us” to grow. In a loving long term relationship we can simply be and not get caught up in the game like mentality that the ego loves to play.

Today I ask you to place aside the rules, the competitiveness and the score keeping and allow the love which bubbles within you to lead your relationship. You will be amazed at the difference this will make in all aspects of your relationship. You will quickly become aware that once you quit approaching relationships as a game that you will feel less frustrated and you will find peace within your relationship and yourself that you have not felt in a long time.

The Answers Are Not Found Here

The disciples were absorbed in a discussion of Lao-tzu’s dictum:

Those who know do not say;

Those who say do not know.

When the Master entered, they asked him what the words meant.

Said the Master, “Which of you knows the fragrance of a rose?”

All of them knew.

Then he said, “Put it into words.”

All of them were silent.

There are no answers to be found in the writings you find here. The words we use to attempt to communicate that which we know are often very limiting and the written word is even more limiting because it does not significantly convey the passion and the feelings that we wish to communicate. Therefore, even when we know what we know it is very often difficult to convey that knowing to another. The best we can do is to offer our thoughts in hopes that what we communicate will help to lift the veil which covers the answers that lie within each one of us.

When we are on the receiving end of communication, what we hear and how we process what we hear is often based on our personal experience, our mood at the moment, the environment which we are in and most importantly where we are at on our journey. What I understand and accept today is often not new material; it is simply material that I was not yet ready to learn at a previous point in my journey. We all travel at a different pace and it is important to recognize that our time in this form is not the beginning and the end, that this life is simply a part of our spiritual continuum.

If we are in a Tibetan monastery and a monk shares his wisdom with us, many our more likely to accept that person’s wisdom as truth then we are if we heard the same words from a homeless person on the street or even our neighbor

Each of us will attempt to discern what is true and what is not, who is a spiritual master and who is a charlatan. As a people we are hungry for answers many are easily persuaded by those who proclaim to know the answers and who present themselves in an environment which helps us to believe. It is rare that a spiritual master will anoint him or her self with that title. The title of spiritual master is often hoisted upon a person by those who know him or her through their teachings and their state of being. Be weary of one who claims to have all of the answers and know all of the truth. Be open to the possibility that there are many who will touch you who will not look or even act like a spiritual master, a teacher. Know that our teachers and lessons come in many forms and we must be diligently aware of who they might be.

I have found that the more I learn the less I know, in other words the more open I become to all of the possibilities the more questions I develop and the deeper I dive for answers. Often what I have come to believe as true changes as I travel further along the path of my journey. I have learned to let go of what I perceive as true and be open to the possibility that my truths are not truths at all or are truths which can be modified as I grow.

What you hopefully will find here and in the writings of others are lessons, ideas, dreams, etc which will serve as a catalyst for you to uncover the knowing, i.e. the answers which you already possess.

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A Question of Our Big Purpose

The fact that I can plant a seed and it becomes a flower, share a bit of knowledge and it becomes another’s, smile at someone and receive a smile in return, are to me continual spiritual exercises. – Leo Buscaglia

A friend and I were talking this morning and she said that she is at a point in her life where she wants to be of help to others, she wants to fulfill a purpose bigger than the day to day life of waking up, going to work, making dinner, taking care of the house day in and day out. She said that she is looking for a bigger purpose of why she is here and what she should be doing.

I think that many people feel the same way at points in their life. When we are children we have societal milestones that many people desire to hit, crossing the street by ourselves, being able to go beyond the neighborhood, getting our driver’s license, becoming an adult, finding a mate, getting married, having children, developing a career, etc. Along this part of our journey there is much going on and many easily get lost in the activity of life and do not give too much thought to their “big” purpose. Often times as we get older we come to a bridge in our life where we stop and access that which we have left in our wake and we ask the question, “Is this all there is, is this life? There must be some greater purpose for me being here than this”. Some people call this a mid-life crisis as many people respond to this question by attempting to replicate what they perceive they have missed or they change their standard way of being as they seek out their greater purpose for existing on this planet.

Often time’s people don’t readily find an answer to what their “big” purpose is and they become despondent or depressed and often fall back into familiar patterns with a nagging belief that they are missing what their true purpose is. For many this leads them to live a life of survival, a rather stagnant life where they withdraw because they don’t feel they have a real purpose.

It is so very easy to get lost in the question of “What is my big purpose”. The sad part is that while some people get overwhelmed with searching for their “big” purpose they miss out on their purpose.

Our purpose is to “be”. Leo Buscaglia said this very eloquently in the above quote as he reminds us that our big purpose does not have to be one big thing, that our purpose instead is a multitude of things, some seemingly big and some seemingly small. Leo reminds us that we have the ability to create by giving of ourselves and in doing so we fulfill our purpose, and we continue to fulfill our purpose everyday in many ways simply by being.

We are the smile on a child’s face; we are the quenched thirst of a thirsty man, the full feeling of a hungry woman, the rest of a weary traveler. We are the planter of seeds of knowledge and wisdom to so many whom we touch. We are the love which heals the ill and mends the broken. We are the ear who listens to the lonely.

See, we are our purpose in so many ways. For many our big purpose is simply to be, to accept, to allow and to give. We impact this world everyday and in so many beautiful ways. Each thought we have fulfills a purpose in some way, even the mistakes that we perceive we make a long the way serve a greater purpose than we often realize.

While it is true that in history books you will find stories of women and men who seemed to have found and lived their great purpose; if you really dig into their biography you will come to understand that which they are remembered for is not because of the one thing they are famous for, we ultimately remember them for the accumulation of things they did along the way that brought them to the main thing we remember them for.

Our purpose is so much greater than one thing and we often live our purpose everyday without a realization of doing so. Be not lost in your search for your “big” purpose for you see you are your “big” purpose, and you fulfill your “big” purpose everyday by being!

Passionate Thoughts

Passion is what boosts the energy of our thoughts, prayers and meditation

Passion is what gives our thoughts the ability to move mountains, create peace, heal and achieve all that we desire

Every thought we have is energy. Thoughts are very powerful energy, more powerful than most understand. When we have a thought, our thought is transmitted as energy. Sometime we become conscious of this, for example; when we are thinking of a friend we have not heard from in a long time and the phone rings and the person we were just thinking about is on the other end.

Depending on your level of awareness, you may be very aware of the power of your thoughts or you may for the most part not consider the power of your thoughts. Many people have a practice of focusing certain thoughts they have in the form of prayer or meditation. When we pray or meditate, often what we are doing is applying a sharper focus to our thoughts in an effort to achieve a desired result such as more peace in our life, more abundance, better health, etc.

The practice of prayer or meditation to focus our thoughts does help to increase the level of energy that our thoughts have, yet many people will exclaim that their prayers are rarely answered or that they do not see the desired benefit from meditation. I contend that the biggest reason that we do not receive what we desire is that our thoughts lack conviction and most importantly lack passion!

Passion is the turbo boost to the energy of our thoughts. When we are passionate about what we are thinking about, praying for or meditating on we are strong in our belief and we increase the energy level of our thoughts and send out a clear, high energy message to the Universe about that which we desire.

Note, passion works for both positive energy and negative energy. When we are passionate with negative thoughts, we add to the energy or power of these thoughts as well. I believe it is important to understand the impact of our passion and that we use our passion in a way to our benefit rather than our determent.

Consider today what you are focusing your thoughts on and ask yourself are you passionate about that which you desire or are you dispassionate about what you desire and do you have conflicting thoughts about what you desire.

You will find it almost impossible to be passionate about something you desire when you have another thought that says you don’t really believe that what you desire you really want or deserve.

You must believe with your core being in that which you desire and with that you must exude passion!

Note, when what we desire is not aligned with our core self, passion cannot be faked or created. What we desire must be in alignment with our core being for passion to be generated.

The Frustrations of Reality and The Beauty of Accepting the Realities of Others

“She/He is not in touch with reality”

“She/He has lost touch with reality”

“That type of thinking is simply not realistic”

Whose reality are we talking about here? When you make statements or have thoughts similar to the ones above, you are basing your judgment on your reality and/or what you perceive as the reality of your culture, the reality of the masses.

Everyone has their own reality; everyone creates their reality through their thoughts, based on their environment and experiences of their journey. It is therefore unfair to expect anyone else to live within your reality, yet, this is exactly what many people do.

In turn because we sometimes expect other people to live within our reality we become frustrated when they don’t. As a matter of fact, I believe that when it comes to personal relationships much of our frustration and angst derives from the fact that another person’s reality does not match our reality.

It is important to note, that everyone’s reality is different, even those who are closest to you and no matter how much we desire our realities to be perfectly aligned, they never will be.

When we accept that each of us lives a different reality, we become more accepting and understanding of other people and in turn reduces our own frustration.

Consider the last time you were upset with someone, was it because the person did not think, say or do something the way you would have done it? If you find yourself frustrated with someone today, ask yourself is it because their reality is different than yours is. Most likely the answer will be a big fat yes; you are frustrated because their reality is different than your reality.

It is important to note that try as we may, we cannot change anyone else’s reality. We may influence a person’s perception to a point where they choose to change their reality however we cannot change their reality. We may at times feel as though we have changed someone’s reality because we impose consequences to behavior, however the change is usually temporary and the person will revert to their reality at some point.

It is also important to note that great spiritual masters such as Jesus and The Buddha had very different realities as have great thinkers like Einstein, Newton, Da Vinci and Aristotle. It is because of their realities that we are so enriched by their teachings, discoveries and inventions. Had they accepted their reality to be the accepted reality of their time and culture we would have lost so much. Great visionaries, teachers, inventors and thinkers often seem unrealistic or out of touch with reality at the time.

Once you begin acknowledging that other people’s realities are not your reality you will begin to see your frustration level drop. Your raised awareness will also help you to build better relationships and repair broken relationships.

Your raised awareness of different realities may also help you to widen your social circle and open you to different possibilities that you may have otherwise missed. We tend to gather with people who’s realities are close to our own because it feels comfortable, it feels as though we are more connected, however when we accept that everyone’s reality is different and not necessarily wrong because it is different we then begin to widen our ability to listen to the ideas of others and to accept the differences in realities as an opportunity rather that as a point of conflict or frustration.

The beauty of understanding our reality and the realities of others is that this awareness leads us to more peace and love within our collective journey.