Are You Bored?
When is the last time you were bored? I recall as a child growing up, one of the most foolish things you could do was to say aloud that you were bored. My parents did not believe in boredom. They were hard working lower middle class Americans who did not get the concept of being bored. They could not understand with all of the modern amenities, 3 channels on TV, radio, books, etc how even on a cold rainy day one could have the audacity to say they were bored. If you did make the rookie mistake of saying you were bored or that you even appeared to be bored than you would be given some chore to do which was surely designed to teach you not to be bored. With this attitude that my parents held, I quickly found ways not to be bored. I found many ways to entertain myself as I grew up.
To this day, I still cringe when I hear someone exclaim that they are bored. I just can’t imagine how anyone could possibly be bored, yet it does seem to happen. It may happen even more now than it ever has before. Why, one may ask, do people become bored?
We have become a culture of doers; many feel that they constantly must be doing something and/or that they must be entertained at the same time. We do live in an interesting time where we as a society are constantly “doing”. The sad thing is that when we do take some time or accidentally find time where we are not doing; we often become agitated, not knowing what to do with ourselves
Boredom is simply the state of believing that we should be doing something else, usually something we perceive is better than what we are doing at the moment.
Boredom than is quite simply a pattern of thoughts. We choose to be bored. We never have to feel bored and when we do find ourselves slipping into what we would refer to as boredom than it is up to us to recognize this state of thought for what it is and choose to make a shift in our perception.
Are you bored with your relationship?
Are you bored with work?
Are you bored with your self?
If you find you are bored with any aspect of your life, then you must ask yourself why? How can you change you thoughts, which will change your actions to remove the boredom?
Many of the modern inventions, washing machines, microwave ovens, cell phones, computers, etc that were designed to lessen the amount of time we are doing the daily chores of life and give us more free time in the end seems to have only given us more time to do more things in a day. Most people have learned to cram more into a day rather than learn how to relax and take some time off from always being in a “doing” mode.
Truth is we like to “do”, we like to be busy. Many like to be in constant state of doing rather than be in a state of being, for many fear the state of simply being. Many fear that if they took the time to simply “be” than they might discover something about themselves that they would rather avoid when the reality is that in self discovery we may in deed find things about ourselves that are not what we want to find, however I know that those things are less than 1% of who we are and the other 99% of what we will find within ourselves will be so powerful that the negatives we find will be quickly discarded.
Once you shift your perspective, you will find that you will relish the times in your day where you have a few minutes. You can use this time to meditate, to go sit on a park bench and let the sun warm your face, to recall all that you have to be grateful for, to sit and people watch, etc. To “Be” is and incredible state of being. One which is critical to our continued growth. It is of great importance that in a way we find the time to be “bored” for this time can be used in many powerful ways.
This is great. When my kids are bored, I tell them, “Good!” Being bored is a good thing. It’s a clear signal being sent to us that we’re doing too much, expecting too much, and we’ve lost ourselves in our dependence on the world to fill our buckets.
I am bored periodically. My boredom comes from being in a frenzy of doing too much. Doing too much, and being over-stimulated, puts me into a very high level of stress and anticipation. When I am at this level of hyper awareness, and I lose the stimulus that put me there, I feel empty, wanting to fill the space = bored.
When I was living abroad, I had many days where I was bored. I was alternating between mental states of a very intense concentration and input with having to learn a new language and culture, and of being alone, without much input at all, in my room. I felt a void that I wanted to fill, instead of simply waking up and being content and fulfilled by living in another country, walking the streets or along the river, or sitting in my room alone and enjoying my own company.
Now that I meditate and make it a point to quiet my mind on purpose, I find myself rarely getting bored. I like my own company now, and can see how being bored is a sign of my expectations, not reality.
It is such a habit for kids to say they are bored. I tell my kids if you are bored it is because you have chosen to be bored. You can choose to find something to do or you can complain. Which is more fun? I find times when I am looking at things the wrong way and have to analyze what my thoughts are focused on — positive or negative. There are way too many things to do. No one should be bored in this amazing world.
Dear mark, thank you for this post about boredom.
At the present moment I have no problems with being bored, but I notice a lot of bored people. Maybe your post will stir thoughts?
I hear it often from our youth that they are bored. I can’t imagine what it must be like to see life and not find something wonderful within it. It’s like watching your favorite movie, everytime you see it you find something that you didn’t notice the last time around. Actually this may sound silly but the first product I ever made I named ” dancing on clouds” after the euphoria you feel when someone or something lifts you off the ground spiritually and finds doing just that dancing on clouds. To this day I don’t hesistate to stop what I am doing and dance on the clouds and feel the euphoria of catching a moment and holding it close. I never tire of the willow blowing in the wind, or the king fisher as he darts down into the stream to catch a minnow. I think many children today, haven’t a clue what they are missing, they are caught up in technology.
Speaking of childhood, I think those childhood games of city life will never be duplicated, we are indeed in a different era. Good in bad in all of it hun!
Hi tobeme
I remember reading or hearing somewhere once that boredom is the “feeling” we get when we are suppressing our feelings. It’s not really to do with whether we are busy or not. That could explain why we can feel bored when there are plenty of things to do, and at other times be perfectly content doing nothing.
Thanks for your post – Robin
Usually, I have more to do (and that I want to do) than will fit into a day. Fortunately, I’m seldom bored. Once in a while it happens. When it does, I’ll come back out to your blog and read this great post again and see if I’ll snap out of it.
Malcolm
I can understand that some people get bored. Our mind craves stimulation. As we get older, in a way it is sad, as we may not crave the stimulation as much, but we often don’t remain open to change and creativity either.
I think that maybe boredom is the antithesis of creativity…that it can be used as a trigger…to remind us…
ah ha….I am feeling bored, so I am also able to choose to tap into creative energy and change my feelings. Creative energy is so very vital that once you get “in the zone” you can’t imagine boredom, you are ever expanding. That change from boredom to creative energy may well be only 5 conscious breaths away…
As always Mark, you write provocative posts that invite conversation. I really appreciate that. I look forward to your posts.
Many blessings,
Harmony
This reminds me of the quote from Mark Twain:
“The cure for boredom is curiosity.
There is no cure for curiosity”
Once upon a time my freshman high school English teacher said, “Only boring people get bored.” I loved that saying and have held onto it ever since. Even when I am spending time alone without activity, my mind is always in thought/contemplation/prayer or taking in a piece of music or if outdoors – simply basking in nature’s beauty and enjoying the sensory experience, even “daydreaming”, but never bored. I like your proposition that being “bored” is a perception problem. I kind of have to pity the people who proclaim to be “bored” as I believe they are not fully engaged in living.
I can relate to what Robin says. For me, boredom feels like ‘carrying my soul under my arm’ as the Dutch say. It usually means that I’m processing things. I could do a lot of stuff, but I feel an almost physical resistance. So usually I just end up sitting up the couch doing nothing or if I can muster up the energy, I go for a walk. I’m quite okay being bored from time to time, it usually serves some deeper purpose.
I am also amazed when I hear people complaining about boredom… I wish I had a moment… your insights are brilliant. And yes I know, having too much to do is also no good… maybe I can find a balance… a semi-bored/ busy a life balance… semi bored… hmm
Tammy,
I love your take on being bored and how you handle this with your children. You are right on the money about being over stimulated. Thanks so much for sharing.
Rjlight,
True, no one should be bored. It really is a matter of awarness and perception. Thanks for your thoughts.
Rainer,
We can only hope that we stir thoughts, for when thoughts are stired who could be bored. Thanks of chiming in!
Rachel,
Yes, it is true, in many ways the youth is blinded by technology, of course this is not limited to the young, many adults are blinded by techonology or some other distraction of choice to where they fail to see all that lies before them. It is wonderful that you have the awareness and desire to dance on the clouds! Thanks for your thoughts.
Robin,
Interesting. I could believe the boredom could come from a suppression of feelings. I will give this some thought. Thanks!
Malcom,
I too can’t remember the last time I was bored. Glad you enjoyed the post! Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Harmony,
I love your thoughts on this and how you related this back to creativity and that by becoming aware of our bored feeling that we can use boredom as a catalyst to be more creative! Excellent thoughts.
Glad that you are enjoying the converstaions and thoughts that you find here.
JonF,
Great quote! Thanks for sharing! May we all be as curious as a child.
Bop,
Your English teacher made a huge impact with that little statement. Now I know that the statement is not entirely true because it is a generalization, however it made you never to be bored. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and what you do to not be bored.
Norea,
Bored for you is not a negative. It sounds like you are not truly bored. Bored and not activily doing something are two different things in my mind. Thanks for sharing!
Enreal,
Balance is good. I do not associate boredom with nothing to do. Boredom to me is a mental choice, it is a state of dissatisifaction with what we presently engaged in doing or not doing.
Thanks for your thoughts and your kind words.
The only time I even feel close to bored is when I have so many choices of things I need to do that I end up doing nothing because of feeling overwhelmed. Then I don’t know what to do with myself and just sloth around getting nowhere fast. It doesn’t happen very often but I hate it when it does. Otherwise there aren’t enough hours in the day.
Gypsy,
I know the feeling, every once in a while we do have too many choices and shut down in a way because we are over whelmed, thanks for sharing.
Bored is having to do so many things that you don’t want to do but have to anyway. And don’t say that you don’t have to do anything. Sometimes you just do have to as it can be or is the matter of life or death to someone else. Caregiving is a type of trap. If you have a conscience you must make do what it takes, like it or not. Think about all those who give up their lives in service to a loved one.
Chris,
Thanks for your thoughts on this. True, we can become over whelmed with the things that we have to get done. The key is to find a way to make these “have tos’ fun. It’s all a matter of perspective.
The key to life is to make things fun.Being bored is something you choose to do. life is so full of things you expect more. When you are bored, you could become helpful and do simple chores around the house, like dusting or vaccuming. Remember, being bored is your choice.
Interesting description of how parents thought our saying “I’m bored” was almost a moral lapse. The comments are interesting. One says being bored is a choice. Others say it’s overwhelm. I wish you all would comment on my blog ThePowerOfBoredom and let me use your thoughts for my book and blog.
Boredom is not a choice for some. It’s pretty much the underlying neurological basis for ADHD and ADD… and lots of people are boredom prone by birth and temperament.
Check out stuff, especailly uncategorized, on my blog ThePowerOfBoredom.com and drop me a line about it on the Contact button. thanks.
Letitia