Forgive
”To error is human, to forgive divine”, I believe is the old saying. This is a simple wisdom which, acknowledges that we all make mistakes. Making mistakes is part of being human, part of our growth process. This simple wisdom also reminds us that to forgive is divine, that is, to forgive is to rise above our humanity and live and act from our spirit.
Let’s think about forgiveness for a moment. When we operate from a center of love, is forgiveness not a given. I mean, if we are truly loving, which means without conditions, than isn’t our forgiveness of our selves and others a natural by-product of unconditional love? For if someone does something to harm or hurt us and we love them without condition, then are they not forgiven instantly? Of course they are!
If this is true, then when we are not forgiving then where are we coming from? The answer is pretty simple, we are not operating from our spiritual side, we then must be operating from our human ego side. We know this side well, this is the side of us that wants to be mad, wants to hold a grudge, wants to exact our non-forgiveness as a form of punishment on the offending person, even if that person is our self. Our ego, wants the offending person to feel the pain of our discontent with them and we often go out of our way to let this person know that we do not forgive them. We may even say something like “I forgive you, however I will never forget”. Tell yourself what you will, however this is a conditional statement and it is not true forgiveness. When a person says this, they are basically pretending to forgive, however they are putting you on notice that this “thing” that they are forgiving you for, is filed away to possibly be used against you at a later date. See, it’s not a loving thing to say or do, and it smacks of insincerity and ego.
Love is forgiving, when love is your being, when you overflow with love, there is no need to forgive, for it is automatic. Your love is not based on conditions.
Forgiving therefore means letting go of what your ego so desperately wants to cling to. You gain nothing by being unforgiving of yourself or others. As a matter of fact, not forgiving others or yourself is like swallowing your own version of poison.
I beseech you to reflect on any un-forgiveness that you are holding on to, find it, look at with love and set it free. To forgive is one of the most powerful and healing things we can do. Forgive your self, forgive others, send yourself and others love, for that is what is needed, love is what will set you free and allow your own energy to change the world.
The most important person in your life to forgive, is always yourself!
Is any of us without error? Why then should we hold others to a higher standard? And as for ourselves, we have nothing to forgive if we act with honesty.
this is wonderful, thank you for posting this…i think this is what Drew Carey was speaking about on “Raw Nerve” with William Shatner…it is the most awesome, greatest of concepts.
love+peace to all,
~ wing
It actually a book called ” A Course of Miracles”
my biggest problem all my life has been accepting responsibility for that which has never been my fault…that in itself becomes something i have difficulty pardoning myself for..
sometimes life becomes more and more convoluted..the more i look at it..
I like to make musical offerings sometimes. I hope you don’t mind.
I like to make musical offerings sometimes. I hope you don’t mind.
WordPress burped, please delete one of those.
In addition, honesty must always be founded in love, as love is the central power of the universe.
Mark, this is the first time I read something really identical to how I’d come to think of forgiveness too. As St. Paul says “Love does not take offense.” If love is there, then in a sense forgiveness never needs to take place. There is a kind of pre-forgiveness.
I have to say that while this still makes perfect sense to me, just as you describe, I find it far easier said than done in the time that’s passed since I began to think and feel that way. I’ve also noticed that forgiveness is a major issue for a lot of people.
To give an idea of how complicated it can get in practice, the frail elderly and the severely disabled quite often end up in situations of dependence on able bodied people who may be unwell psychologically and spiritually. This makes the harm done to them ongoing rather than an event that’s over and done with, and that lives on only if the person nurtures their hurt. And the harm done can be severe, even physical, so that you might say the body “takes offense.”
It’s all a much taller order than anything I could have imagined as a physically healthy and independent person.
what i find difficult is to forgive someone who isn’t even sorry about what they’ve done, or not aware that what they’re doing or saying is already hurting.
Wise words, Mark. My own experience has shown me that until we truly forgive ourselves, it’s impossible to extend true and lasting forgiveness to someone else. When we have forgiven ourselves, and received forgiveness, the love flows like a river. How could we NOT forgive someone else, then?
I understand what you’re saying about ‘forgetting’. I would just like to add that keeping healthy boundaries – even if that means removing ourselves from a particular relationship that is chronically in need of ‘forgiveness’
– is not a bad thing, nor does it show any lack of forgiveness or love on our part.
It just means we love ourselves enough to learn from the lessons we go through…we love ourselves enough that, at times, we say “No” or “Goodbye”.
Very nice post. True forgiveness is a wonderful thing. I believe people act out of love, no matter what they are doing. The people that I know who have enemies are in a constant state of unhappiness, anger, unrest, etc. Once I forgave all whom I had issues with, the world changed into a happy place, rather than a victim based evil society. I sleep great at night knowing who I am. And I always wondered why I had sleeping problems.
Advanced Soul,
Glad that you are advancing and as a result have found a greater peace within yourself. Thanks for your thoughts.
Michael,
Thanks for your thoughts and the musical offering! Very good!
Karoline,
Life can definetly become twisted. I am not sure I understand. Why do you accept responsibilty for that which is not yours?
Paul,
Thank-you for giving us insight into how forgivness is viewed by someone who’s life had physically changed in such a dramatic way.
I agree, the way we think about forgivness is ideal, not always easy to put into practice, however worth striving towards. Thanks for sharing so much of your self.
Yet another marvelous insight to the human condition…
“When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.”
- Catherine Ponder
Forgiving is not forgetting…..less we forget we lay path to the negative repetition that creates tomorrows victims. I shall not weigh my soul down with resentment nor anger, but neither will I free you to take advantage of my spirit.
All is remembered but may not need be recalled to mind. Which is what we say at each New Year, to set things fresh and let a new start be made.
Enreal,
Great quote, thank-you for sharing and reinforcing the message of the power of forgivness.
Rachel,
I agree, that we must learn from what happens in our life. I do believe to forgive and not forget, to me, is to forgive with conditions and that a person is still holding on to that which they forgave. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
Michael,
Well said. True, we never forget anything, however we do choose not to recall everything. Thanks for your thoughts.